Approach Control: 747 Heavy, traffic is a 777 at your 2 o’clock at 4000 feet.747 Heavy: Roger, Approach, we have that light twin in sight. Related Topics. Bomber Aircraft Low Passes. More cartoons @ www.swamp.com.au Since our plane doesn’t come standard with rear view mirrors, could you keep us apprised? I can land on any runway and hold short of any other runway.Tower (with an over-full load): Roger, we request you land at Chicago Executive and hold short of O’Hare. Imagine you don't tell th, Current situation If a man can control his mind he can find the way to Enlightenment, and all wisdom and virtue will naturally come to him. Some quick-witted comedian in the DC-8 crew got on the radio and said, “What a cute little plane. . ?”Pilot (LH 876): “To avoid delay.”, Tower Controller: “BA356, proceed to stand 69”BA: “Yes, Sir, Nose in or Nose out?”, United cargo jet (with female pilot): “This is my secondary radio. About halfway across, ATC requested a 90 degree right turn.My friend responded: “What do you want me to do? A DC-10 had come in a little hot and thus had an exceedingly long roll out after touching down. Pin. See more ideas about air traffic control, bones funny, traffic. Approach: Cessna X, your mode C is intermittently reporting 3,000 feet. Air Traffic Humor Joke. Some busy areas operate 'traffic separation schemes,' but mostly, ships are treated like cars on roads where there are rules and codes of behavior, and successful, accident-free outcomes depend on everyone respecting them. The reality is that we do not have an air traffic control system that is smart enough and technologically capable enough to be able to handle that kind of demand. Furloughing a bunch of air traffic controllers has a pretty easy-to-predict effect on air travel: It causes delays. Tower: Traffic at your 6 o’clock, 2 miles, same altitude, closing slowly.Pilot: Roger. ... Another episode focused on how the nation’s air traffic control system works, the role of aviation in wildfires and another on how drones can be used for the good of others. Votes: 4 The last one was the best. Pilot in a holding pattern: Tower, Request an ETA.Tower: Cessna X, Do you have a situation that requires priority?Pilot: Does “Daddy, I gotta go” qualify?Tower: Cessna X, cleared for immediate approach. 341, 342, 343, 344, 345…”, Tower: “Hotel Papa Oscar climb four thousand to six thousand and maintain.”Pilot: “Hotel Papa Oscar, climbing flight level 100.”Tower: “Hotel Papa Oscar, climb to flight level 60 and maintain.”Pilot: “But 4 and 6 is 10, isn’t it?”Tower: “You’re supposed to climb, not add.”, Tower: “Delta Fox Alpha, hold position, Marshall will park you.”Pilot: “Roger. Taxi to gate Alpha One-Seven.” The BA 747 pulled onto the main taxiway and slowed to a stop.Ground: “Speedbird, do you not know where you are going?”Speedbird 206: “Stand by, Ground, I’m looking up our gate location now.”Ground (with quite arrogant impatience): “Speedbird 206, have you not been to Frankfurt before?”Speedbird 206 (coolly): “Yes, twice in 1944, but it was dark,… and I didn’t land.”, There is no such thing as a beautiful english accent. The helicopter companies said the weather was an act of God and blamed air traffic controllers. (Translation: how much longer? Did you copy that report from Eastern 702?”Continental 635: “Continental 635, cleared for takeoff, roger; and yes, we copied Eastern… we’ve already notified our caterers.”, One day the pilot of a Cherokee 180 was told by the tower to hold short of the active runway while a DC-8 landed. Funny air traffic controllers quotes. Pilot: Airliner X, request a 360 to parking.Tower: 360 approved, 180 recommended. Murphy's Plough - positive thinking story. Pilot: Tower, please call me a fuel truck.Tower: Roger. … and this went around a few times. US Air Force Air Traffic Control School (14.5 wks) – this course teaches aircraft recognition and performance, air navigation aids, weather, airport traffic control, flight assistance service, communication procedures, conventional approach control, radar procedures, and air traffic rules. Please keep them coming. Tower: Hawk 20, is this the same aircraft declaring emergency about two hours ago ?Pilot: Negativ, Sir. Controller: “FAR1234 confirm your type of aircraft. Air traffic control staff are to take industrial action over plans to centralise some air traffic control at Highlands and Islands Airports Ltd. ... 15 sayings from around the world. Tower: What’s your heigth and position?Pilot: Well, I m 6 foot tall and I m sitting front left. #aviati, Spot the airplane... Pilot:: Tower, give me a rough time checkTower: It’s Thursday, Sir. 2nd pilot no I did not say f***k did you?? Character Morality Integrity Being The Bigger … The Air Traffic Control Duck oversees Swamp's airspace. A phrase search can be performed by enclosing the search string in quotes. For instance, searching for "technical director" will only return results that contain the exact phrase supplied, with the words in the order specified. Mad Max Inspired Plane to Monster Car Makeover. Air Traffic Controllers Funny Quotes. A shortage of airports runways and gates along outmoded air traffic control systems have made U.S. air travel the most congested in the world. . Some busy areas operate 'traffic separation schemes,' but mostly, ships are treated like cars on roads where there are rules and codes of behavior, and successful, accident-free outcomes depend on everyone respecting them. By the way, after we lifted off we saw some kind of dead animal on the far end of the runway.”Tower: “Continental 635, cleared for takeoff behind Eastern 702, contact Departure on frequency 124.7. Votes: 3, Raising people is not some lark. “Because you lost the bloody war.” It was learnt that the missionary left the tower in tears.She did receive a nice bunch of flowers an chocolate in the mail… Read more », Pilot: RWT Downstream touch and go. So it was with some amusement that we (a Pan Am 747) listened to the following exchange between Frankfurt ground control and a British Airways 747, call sign Speedbird 206.Speedbird 206: “Frankfurt, Speedbird 206 clear of active runway.”Ground: “Speedbird 206. Make your next left turn, inner taxiway to your terminal, Do you require any assistance?. The commercial drone is no exception. . An airliner was in a holding pattern waiting for the Democratic Presidential Nominee to leave the area.Tower: Airliner X, can you hold for another 10 minutes?Pilot: Yes sir, however, please advise the Democrats that more and more passengers are turning Republican. Pilot: ughhh following traffic late downwind RWT. I hope this answers your questions! Dec 27, 2020 - Explore Donna Rice's board "Air Traffic Control", followed by 202 people on Pinterest. Votes: 5, The reality is that we do not have an air traffic control system that is smart enough and technologically capable enough to be able to handle that kind of demand. Quotes about air-traffic. The private pilot got a little nervous because the military plane was closer than normal, and asked the tower to find out the intentions of the C-5. . 10 Picture Quotes. Tower: Airliner X, it looks like you have a baggage door open.Airliner: Thank you for the report, but that must be our APU door that’s open for cooling.Tower: Airliner X, you have luggage falling out of your APU door. . I have a lot of common experiences. Tower: Cannot read you, say again!Pilot: Again! These funny conversations 'allegedly' took place between air traffic controllers, pilots and air crew around the world. The 182 tow plane had no radio, but the Blanik did.No problem, after departing the glider called ATC and gave their intentions to cross The Class C airspace. I am grateful for these ATC and aviation quotes and stories sent to me by various people. Flight Watch: Cessna, Traffic 12 o’clock, 2 miles and closing fast.Pilot: Flight Watch, was that message for Cessna 59J or Cessna 25K?Flight Watch: Both of you. Tower: Mission triple-three, do you have problems?Pilot: I think, I have lost my compass.Tower: Judging the way you are flying, you lost the whole instrument panel. Ground control: “Lufthansa 243 heavy, that’s approved. Funny air traffic controllers quotes. It feels like it, too. . Cessna: “Jones tower, Cessna 12345, student pilot, I am out of fuel.”Tower: “Roger Cessna 12345, reduce airspeed to best glide!! If it is an American Airlines Flight, it is 3 o’clock. Pilot: Tower, there’s a runway light burning.Tower: I m sure there must be dozens of lights burning.Pilot: Sorry, I mean it’s smoking. Tweet +1. ATC: “Delta 324, are you listening to me?” Pilot: “ Yes ma’am, we hear you.” These funny conversations 'allegedly' took place between air traffic controllers, pilots and air crew around the world: Tower: "Delta 351, you have traffic at 10 o'clock, 6 miles!" Thanks for reading, Ken. The DC-8 landed, rolled out, turned around, and taxied back past the Cherokee. Votes: 3 He then goes to Jester & Viper and complains about the fly by that both Maverick and Goose did of his tower.. The Professional Air Traffic Controllers Organization or PATCO was a United States trade union that operated from 1968 until its decertification in 1981 following an illegal strike that was broken by the Reagan Administration. If a man can control his mind he can find the way to Enlightenment, and all wisdom and virtue will naturally come to him. . Controller: Flight XYZ, can you climb to FL390?XYZ: Standby (A few seconds pass)XYZ: We can make it, but we’ll have to throw out a few passengersController: That’s approved. The Boeing 737-500 disappeared from radar four minutes later, after the pilot contacted air traffic control to ascend to an altitude of 29,000 feet (8,839 metres), he said. What my mom thinks I do. It is the standard gauge in Europe, also. )Tower: Indefinite.Pilot: I’m pretty sure we don’t have fuel for that. #aviation #avgeek #pilo, Cat plays with a bird... What society thinks I do. He was, probably, a former Luftwaffe pilot. ... choosing his targets, today's saboteur could pollute a city's water supply, dynamite power transmission towers, cripple an airport control center, destroy a corporate or government computer center. Yell out the window?”, Allegedly the German air controllers at Frankfurt Airport are renowned as a short-tempered lot. If a crew really needed to, they could use 121.5 during an entire emergency event from start to finish. ”Cessna: “To get my Commercial Pilots Licence and Instrument Rating.”ATC: “I meant in the next five minutes not years.”. “Cleared to New York Kennedy, Compton 3 Foxtrot departure, Squawk 6244, QNH 998 Hectopascals”. While attempting to locate the aircraft on radar, ATC asks:“What was your last known position?”The reply:“When I was number one for takeoff”. From Zany Afandi (Aug 2017) One evening during the Month of Ramathan (Ramazan) where most Muslims fast during the day, I was about to start eating and drinking. Accipio Accelerate. As on roads, this doesn't always work. Female student pilot with a pretty voice: “Cessna X … Ready for takeoff, request a straight approach.”. Back to: Single Liners. We were eager for dinner as we ha… As on roads, this doesn't always work. ... the high-stress world of air-traffic controllers--and throws in a source of conflict to ramp up the tension. Delta 351: "Give us another hint! A shortage of airports runways and gates along outmoded air traffic control systems have made U.S. air travel the most congested in the world. Beginnings. Lost Student Pilot: Tower, Cessna X, Requesting help determining my location, I’m lost.Tower: Can you fly over any identifiable man made objects like a highway or water tower?Pilot: Affirmative, I just flew by a water tower, but all it said was “Class of ’09.”. controller. It’s only the same pilot. Say your altitude.Pilot: Cessna X is intermittently at 3,000 feet. . Student Pilot: “I’m lost; I’m over a lake and heading toward the big E.”Controller: “Make several 90 degree turns so I can identify you on radar.”(short pause)…Controller: “Okay then. It's air-traffic control. Quotes displayed in real-time or delayed by at least 15 minutes. A nation that destroys its soils destroys itself. Raising people is not some lark. Tower: Have you got enough fuel or not?Pilot: Yes.Tower: Yes what?? Send. . If you are not able, take the Guadalupe exit off Highway 101, make a right at the lights and return to the airport.”, A military pilot called for a priority landing because his single-engine jet fighter was running “a bit peaked.” Air Traffic Control told the fighter pilot that he was number two, behind a B-52 that had one engine shut down. If it is an Air Force, it is 1500 hours. Looking out for John Wayne.”. The controller who was working a busy pattern told the 727 on downwind to make a three-sixty (to do a complete circle, usually to provide spacing between aircraft). You are a fuel truck. That lake is the Atlantic Ocean. Log in as an administrator and view the Instagram Feed settings page for more details. If it is an Army aircraft, the big hand is on the 12 and the little hand is on the 3. Sometimes cheat sheets are needed... Communications with air traffic control were described as normal up until the moment that the plane sharply deviated from its intended course and crashed. Thank you so much for taking the time to answer my … What I think I do. Bomber Pilots Do Them Too. For ace "tin-pusher" Nick Falzone (John Cusack), that conflict arrives in the form of Russell Bell (Billy Bob Thornton), an Irish/Choctaw half-breed whose Zen-like control of air traffic immediately puts Nick on … Are you an Airbus 330 or 340?”Pilot: “A340 of course!”Controller: “Then would you mind switching on the two other engines and give me a 1000 feet per minute, please?”, Champ Pilot: “Shaw Tower, Champ 71X with Echo for Landing.”Tower: “Champ 71X, Cleared to Land.”Jet Pilot: “Shaw Tower, Learjet 22U with Echo for Landing.”Tower: “Champ 71X, Remain East of River, Learjet 22U, Radar contact 15 miles, approved for the straight in approach.”Champ Pilot: “Shaw Tower, request priority landing.”Tower: “Learjet 22U, are you OK letting the Champ slip in?”Champ Pilot (impersonating the Jet Pilot): “Affirmative, we’ll wait.”. Lufthansa replies: “Negative; we seem to be missing a passenger”. Melody Beattie, Standing in the middle of the road is very dangerous; you get knocked down by the traffic from both sides. Forests are the lungs of our land, purifying the air and giving fresh strength to our people. Air Boss Johnson is the air traffic controller at TOPGUN.He hates Maverick for buzzing the tower which causes him to spill his coffee on his uniform. I have a lot of common experiences. Is my transmission still fuzzy?Oakland ARTCC controller: “I don’t know. Air Traffic Control Common Phraseology "Cleared to taxi" When told by ground control or tower that you are cleared to taxi, the controller has given you instruction to taxi along taxiway centerlines according to taxiway markings. I overheard this similar exchange while taxiing at JFK, back in the 70s: “Kennedy ground control, this is Lufthansa 243 heavy. Another landing like yours and I’ll have enough for another one.”. Another voice on the GC frequency: “Have you checked the oven?” Another German, heavily accented voice, probably the captain: “Dat vas not in ze least bit funny”. Pilot: Logan Ground, Radio Check.Tower: You sound like you are calling from inside a tin can.Pilot: Roger. Usually, there is no equivalent of air traffic control at sea. Share. Like. To enjoy good health, to bring true happiness to one's family, to bring peace to all, one must first discipline and control one's own mind. Margaret Thatcher, Tower: "TWA 2341, for noise reduction turn right 45. Ground Control: Airliner X, Good news, you are clear to taxi to the active.Pilot: Roger, What’s the bad news?Ground Control: No bad news at the moment, but you probably want to get gone before I find any. The Murphy's Plough positive thinking story. Air Boss Johnson spilling his coffee. Do you have the airfield in sight?!?! Pilot (after a long time in a holding pattern): Tower, could we get an EFC? Jet Pilot: Tower, we’d like to report a family of foxes crossing the taxiway.Tower: Roger that. What my boss thinks I do. As on roads, this doesn't always work. Denver Tower: Gulfstream X, You’re cleared to 9,000 feet. After calling the pilot three or four times without a response, air traffic control gets a little agitated. Every air traffic control facility in the world monitors 121.5. Road safety slogans are important to remind the people to follow traffic rules. Most Read. I have the ordinary experience of being anonymous when I'm in an airplane talking to air-traffic control, and they don't know who they're talking to. If an aircraft is in distress, they can find help on this frequency. Air Traffic Controller: AirEast 31, do you wish to file a report of any kind to us? We have digital watches!”, “TWA 2341, for noise abatement turn right 45 Degrees.”“Centre, we are at 35,000 feet. Error: API requests are being delayed for this account. For instance, our interconnected world depends on elaborate networks: electric power grids, air traffic control, international finance, just-in-time delivery, and so forth. Show more. Tower: Motorglider X, Can you go any faster?Motorglider: Not if we want to climb. If it is a Navy aircraft, it is 6 bells. Votes: 5, I have the ordinary experience of being anonymous when I'm in an airplane talking to air-traffic control, and they don't know who they're talking to. We must return to the gate. Real (allegedly) funny air traffic controllers and pilots conversations. We have digital watches!" How much noise can we make up here?”“Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a 727?”, From an unknown aircraft waiting in a very long takeoff queue: “I’m f…ing bored!”Ground Traffic Control: “Last aircraft transmitting, identify yourself immediately!”Unknown aircraft: “I said I was f…ing bored, not f…ing stupid!”, Control tower to a 747: “United 329 heavy, your traffic is a Fokker, one o’clock, three miles, Eastbound.”United 239: “Approach, I’ve always wanted to say this… I’ve got the little Fokker in sight.”. Below is a detailed list of Road Safety Slogans: _ Better Late than Never! I’m off at 5 if you want to go out for dinner. They are included here firstly and simply because many are very funny; secondly because the collection provides examples of not so great communications and relationships between 'customers and suppliers', in the context of achieving … Forests are the lungs of our land, purifying the air and giving fresh strength to our people. Votes: 4, I don't know: Why aren't people fascinated by air traffic controllers? Great post, i’m heading directly for the next two! San Jose Tower noted: “American 751, make a hard right turn at the end of the runway, if you are able. Thank you. 1080 matching entries found. . Reply. It's serious work with serious repercussions. Some busy areas operate 'traffic separation schemes,' but mostly, ships are treated like cars on roads where there are rules and codes of behavior, and successful, accident-free outcomes depend on everyone respecting them. New posts will not be retrieved. The new building at the Kolkata airport, with more than 50 metres of height, will be equipped with advanced digital technology in the field of communication and air traffic system. Tower: Cessna 310, that taxiway is approved for single engine use only.Pilot: Roger, shutting down one engine. Votes: 1 !”Cessna: “Uh…tower, I am on the south ramp; I just want to know where the fuel truck is.”, On some air bases, the Air Force is on one side of the field and civilian aircraft use the other side of the field, with the control tower in the middle.One day the tower received a call from an aircraft asking, “What time is it?”The tower responded, “Who is calling?”The aircraft replied, “What difference does it make?”The tower replied “It makes a lot of difference. Air Traffic Controller. . Standing in the middle of the road is very dangerous; you get knocked down by the traffic from both sides. (8 Quotes) The airlines are being constrained by an air-traffic control system that is billions of dollars behind where it needs to be financially and decades behind where it needs to be technologically. Year Presidents of PATCO 1969–1970 James E. Hays 1970–1980 John F. Leyden 1980–1982 Robert E. Poli: 1982 Gary W. Eads PATCO was founded in 1968 with the … Air Traffic Controller Quotes: [first lines] Air Traffic Controller: Flight 101, maintain course correction at 1000 feet, and hold in the pattern. Traffic is a Pitts at 11 o’clock climbing to 4,500.Pilot: Is the Pitts doing aerobatics?Tower: Not intentionally, but it may start if you don’t expedite your descent. What my friends think I do. Tower: “Delta 351, you have traffic at 10 o’clock, 6 miles!”Delta 351: “Give us another hint! “As with all new inventions, there are upsides and downsides. Mobile notifications put people in a state of perpetual emergency interruption - similar to what 911 operators and air traffic controllers experienced back in the '70s and '80s. You can't step out for a minute; you can barely pause to scratch your ankle. Sometimes a little bit of power goes to his head and sometimes the other ducks mess with him. But think about it, we don’t burn much fuel.Tower: You must really smile when you get fuel.Motorglider: Roger that, with a 7 gallon tank, we get to stop and smile a lot. Votes: 3, Advances in technology - hugely beneficial though they are - render us vulnerable in new ways. Why must I speak English?”Unknown voice from another plane (in a beautiful British accent): “Because you lost the bloody war.”, Tower: “Eastern 702, cleared for takeoff, contact Departure on frequency 124.7”Eastern 702: “Tower, Eastern 702 switching to Departure. #Mechanics – Keeping #pilots alive since 1903! “Ah,” the fighter pilot remarked, “The dreaded seven-engine approach.”, Allegedly, a Pan Am 727 flight waiting for start clearance in Munich overheard the following:Lufthansa (in German): “Ground, what is our start clearance time?”Ground (in English): “If you want an answer you must speak in English.”Lufthansa (in English): “I am a German, flying a German airplane, in Germany. The foxes help keep families of birds from nesting in the area. Overworked, overstressed and over the top. Votes: 3, Furloughing a bunch of air traffic controllers has a pretty easy-to-predict effect on air travel: It causes delays. Student pilots often learn the mechanics of flying before the details of communicating on the radio. In reference to the picture above, I was told by somebody who knows everything – some very smart captain I once flew with – that the gauge of railroad tracks is the same width as the standard Roman chariot axle. Of course, one always believes his captain, right? For a vector to Hector, contact the sector director. 2 quotes have been tagged as air-traffic: Alex Morritt: ‘Owning a drone does not a pilot make.’ and Alex Morritt: ‘As with all new inventions, there are ... Home My Books Votes: 3, Centralization of society's vital services in giant computer centers, reservoirs, nuclear power plants, air- traffic control centers, 100-story skyscrapers, and government compounds increases its vulnerability. Epic. . The Boeing 737-500 disappeared from radar four minutes later, after the pilot contacted air traffic control to ascend to an altitude of 29,000 feet (8,839 meters), he said. Votes: 3, Usually, there is no equivalent of air traffic control at sea. #generalaviation #a, V-22 Osprey Barrel Roll. Alex Cisneros is an air traffic controller at Southern California TRACON, one of the busiest terminal radar control facilities in the world. Air Traffic Control told the fighter pilot that he was number two, behind a B-52 that had one engine shut down. “Ah,” the fighter pilot remarked, “The dreaded seven-engine approach.” Allegedly, a Pan Am 727 flight waiting for start clearance in Munich overheard the following: Male ATC: Cessna X takeoff approved. Discover and share Air Traffic Control Quotes. #aviation #aircraftmechani, Instagram post 2262680596054945063_8426324885, WILSON! Votes: 3, Mobile notifications put people in a state of perpetual emergency interruption - similar to what 911 operators and air traffic controllers experienced back in the '70s and '80s. Advances in technology - hugely beneficial though they are - render us vulnerable in new ways. The pilot of the 727 complained, "Do you know It costs us two thousand dollars to make a three-sixty in this airplane? Pilot: O’Hare Tower, Bonanza X, request landing. Free Posters - motivational, inspirational, funny. If it is a Marine Corps aircraft, it’s Thursday afternoon.”, A friend of mine was ferrying his Blanik to a nearby airport on the other side of some Class C Airspace. Number of road accidents are increasing and the only way to reduce them is to create awareness among people using these road safety slogans. Air Traffic Controller Quotes & Sayings . Alert today – […] . Due to the nature of these stories, flight terminology below may not always be technically correct, and may also be edited or explained in parts for the benefit of non-aviation folk. “Yes, twice in 1944, but it was dark,… and I didn’t land.”, I heard this at SFO: After a Western B-737, obviously very light, took off and climbed rapidly: “Nice punt, Western.”. Did you make it all by yourself?” The Cherokee pilot, not about to let the insult go by, came back with a real zinger: “I made it out of DC-8 parts. Tower: Airliner X, please expedite descent through 4,000 feet. Usually, there is no equivalent of air traffic control at sea. You will be cleared to land on Runway 4 East in two minutes. Centralization of society's vital services in giant computer centers, reservoirs, nuclear power plants, air- traffic control centers, 100-story skyscrapers, and government compounds increases its vulnerability. Pilot: “Condor 471, don’t you have a Follow-me ?”Tower: “Negativ, let’s just see how your find your own way to Gate 10.”, Tower: “Delta Zulu Romeo, turn right now and report your heading.”Pilot: “Wilco. Votes: 1, A nation that destroys its soils destroys itself. 2 comments military cargo planes one talking to another and in the conversation the word f***k is spoken.At this time Morsby tower was occupied by a lady who demanded to know who said that and asked the question from the 3 captains 1 pilot I did not say f***k did you???

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